The first guy I dated after my separation introduced me to the concept of ghosting someone. At the time it didn’t occur to me to ask him why someone would do that. I should have asked: “Why would someone be such a coward?” “Wouldn’t you want the other person to know how it went south?” “Why not just be honest?”
But I didn’t and three months later after we had a small disagreement he ghosted me and I then understood how devastating not knowing can be.
As I was driving through Georgia and Tennessee last night I couldn’t help but think about the latest ghost in my life.
Nash and I met on POF about two months ago. He was planning a trip to see a friend in Charlotte and we chatted about things to do and places to see in the city. We exchanged numbers and agreed to try to meet up while he was in town. While visiting we talked but never got up because I was caught up with a bachelorette weekend.
The following weeks we texted, talked, and facetimed daily. We discussed our careers, our families, our children, our exes, and the cities we lived in and loved. After a couple weeks he asked what he needed to do to get me to visit him in Nashville. I told him he simply needed to sell the idea to me. He said that would be easy.
So, after very little contemplating, I agreed. I mean, I need a mini vacation and why not visit a new city. I checked my calendar, threw out a couple sets of dates and we decided the third week of September worked best for both of us. I found a hotel and he started working on an itenirary. He was excited to finally meet me in person and show off his precious city. I was excited to get away for a few days and I knew he would be the best tour guide.
We talked about the trip almost everyday. He asked lots of questions, getting to know me in order to plan things he knew I would enjoy. And then about a week ago, nothing. We were discussing his daughters’ ball games and then he just stops texting. One minute we are talking about the importance of writing things in a planner and the next he isn’t answering my messages. I even reached out and asked if I could know what happened but that was also ignored.
I don’t know if I’m more disappointed, hurt, or angry. I don’t normally like to put a lot of effort or time into getting to know a guy without meeting him first for this very reason. I thought Nash was more mature but I guess I didn’t know him at all.